Tuesday, October 11, 2011

First Nutshell: Six Months of Roller Coaster in Two Nutshells

It was six months ago when I wrote my last entry entitled Final Pay: On Being Free, Drunk, and Flirty. It was all about moving on from my previous job and enjoying life by partying right after I get my final pay. Instead of explaining to you why I haven't written anything for almost half a year, I will tell you what happened each month and what rendered me away from my site.

Friday, April 15, 2011

Final Pay: On Being Free, Drunk, and Flirty

Last Wednesday was a day of dread. I was  supposed to go back to work only to get my final pay and get cleared. I didn't think I would ever be prepared to do such a thing. It was my third work already and, for the past two works, I never gave proper resignation and this would be my first. Many things happened during that night and the morning after, I didn't think things would end up in a better way.

Tuesday, April 12, 2011


Last night was my fifth night of not going to the office. Again, I wasn't able to finish my assigned work which was due a week ago. That was a total bummer because I actually care for the company; I guess my writing prowess just took its toll and totally betrayed me in all ways possible. I already filed my resignation because I find it really hard to write these days. I am already halfway through my 30-day turnover but I guess I couldn't maintain the same energy and zeal to continue. So, last night, as I work on my assigned task, I wrote this email together with what I have already done:

Monday, April 11, 2011

Too Late But Still Warm as a Cigarette Flame

Today, some weeks after my birthday, my heart was lifted to a certain altitude with the arrival of an LBC first class mail addressed to me. Thought it was my phone bill but, when I opened, it was a greeting card from my favorite cancer stick. I find it quite fascinating, to tell the truth. Moreso, it made me wonder which event I have attended where I gave such important information. I was drunk then; that's for sure. Nonetheless, this is something heartwarming to receive. Expect eight more years of patronage from me, "friends from Marlboro!"

Of Beauty and People

Hours ago, I wanted to cap this weekend and make it complete by watching yet another Barbra Streisand film so I decided to see the last movie I have got in stock in my torrent list, Funny Lady. And, watching Binibining Pilipinas 2011 right now, it made me realize that one of the things that actually matter for something to be timeless is by being exceptional. There are far too many ladies trying to become sexy, gorgeous, and beautiful that you tend to forget this year's winners in just a matter of months; unless they win or do something stupid for the international pageants.

Saturday, April 9, 2011

"Alcoholic Homosexual Friend"

So there is one-- no actually a lot-- times where I was bored and Google my name for fun. One of the most amazing things about it is that, aside from the social media sites I joined, there is a certain search result that always comes up-- it is Shinji's blog. In one of his blogs, he referred to me as an "Alcoholic Homosexual Friend." I totally find it cool because that was true and I am not afraid of those-- being alcoholic, being homosexual, and being his friend. We were housemates during my last two years in college and I have learned a lot from him. He is a totally awesome person-- straight, by the way-- from whom I heard of things I never heard before. Because of him, I was introduced to countless things that shaped my being-- including the song that was embedded above. I miss Shinji. We are now in the working force and are doing great. I hope to see him soon though. :)

I tried to accompany this post with an image but when I Googled "drunk gay," numerous gay porn snapshots appeared. Yeah, that's true. Many things happen when there's a gay guy in a drinking table. :p

My Future Husband

Tonight, I started reading gay blogs from Filipinos over the Net. Gay Pinoys like Manila Gay Guy and Mandaya Moore never failed in amusing me and igniting my thoughts, be it of deep things to ponder upon or of rather shallow things that make me smile with the laptop. That is how I have realized that my blog is totally boring. Who is actually interested in work-related stuffs and other inner issues, right? So I have decided to write more about other sensitive topics-- like love, sex, and relationships.

Friday, April 8, 2011

Our First Decent Camera: The GE X5

Photography has been a trend these days. And, (un)fortunately, I have been on the bandwagon since I experienced how wonderful it can be way back when I was working for the Army Public Affairs, encountering various photographers from newspapers-- James Mananghaya of The Philippine Star, above all, who was kind enough to give us a seminar/workshop. It has ignited a well-wicked candle in me that is the fondness with playing with light. So, to say the least, I was ecstatic when my father agreed on buying a decent camera with my three-thousand-peso contribution.

Farewell is Difficult and Other Realizations

For the past few days, going to work has been lighter for me because of the thought that I would be staying there for only a couple of weeks. Though I have been coming there with the excitement of leaving, I did not forget that I should give my best during my last few days at the company. However, everything begins to become more difficult when a certain project was given to me. You see, from a website company, our office became a sex toy store site that will open soon. This means that I-- being the copywriter-- get to write product descriptions for countless sex toys that I did not even know exist.

Wednesday, March 30, 2011

The Fast Approach of Rather Radical Changes

You may have already realized that I am a very lazy person, resulting in a very bad rate of blog posts that declined to an average of once a week. Nonetheless, the rate of occurrences that are happening in my life are completely the opposite of what my discipline and commitment pose. It seems like God's hands are very much happy to change the course of my life in this crucial part of my being.

Tuesday, March 22, 2011

I Had It Coming

So as I mentioned on my previous blog, I had a four-day worth of workload that I needed to get done last weekend. Apparently, the major major crammer that I am, I only did these things about three hours from actually going to work. This fact actually pisses me off because I seem not to care about anything these days anymore-- most especially my work. I thought I already hit rock bottom during my Army days, but today, it seems like I dug even deeper than that solid rock bottom. That's how strong my habit procrastination is these days. So needless to say, I did not finish the four-day load within three hours though I was able to submit something to my manager because I know that he will be needing it for his and the other bosses' Monday meeting.

Sunday, March 20, 2011

One Lazy Weekend with the Nazis

For a very long time, I have been spending my weekends outside our house, burning my well-earned money in more ways than one. It's either I go to the mall to shop and watch movie or go to a club and drown myself in alcohol. Occasionally, I would meet friends and stay with them for cups of coffees and endless laughs, killing minute after minute with stories from the past and those that never existed at all. I would say that I feel bad about all the money gone, but I believe that I have spent them in the best ways possible.

Wednesday, March 16, 2011

Perhaps I Was Wrong

For the past days, I have been having so much internal turmoil because I am starting to hate my job. I have only been working for only five months and this is the first time that I actually felt so strongly against it. Thinking of it, I can come up with only two reasons to justify the way I was feeling.

Tuesday, March 15, 2011

What Pushed Me to Do This

Honestly, I don't know where to begin. This has been my third-- or was it fourth?-- attempt at making an online journal for everyone to see. I am a very open person. As a matter of fact, I am very much open that I do not see the need for an online journal to be published by me. I usually confide to my close friends and tell them what has been happening with my life. However, I usually forget things. Perhaps my alcoholism is starting to take a toll on my brain, limiting my capability to remember. I believe that my life is an exciting one. I am gay and I have a lot of friends to keep me company during whatever times. But then I realized that I cannot remember most of my good times. I think that is the moment I began considering writing a blog. Perhaps I should try being less open and try pouring my emotions to an online diary instead. And so came my past blogs, from Live Journal, to Friendster, to WordPress-- all attempts in vain to keep my memories within easy recall.